Jump to content

chubbstar

Deceased
  • Posts

    2,102
  • Joined

  • Last visited

    Never

Posts posted by chubbstar

  1. Our First AFO Charter "Out There Charters" think it was called. I used Chicken breast cut into strips and covered with parmasarn cheese. I do believe that I caught the most fish that day. Only other dude that was catching well was Faulked on steak strips.

    Never forget Jeff F with his awesome catch of Grinner!!! LMFAO

  2. I can imagine Ray or Dino doing this!!!

    Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting.

    Well, for example, the other day my wife and I went into town and went into a shop.

    We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket.

    We went up to him and said, 'Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?'

    He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tyres.

    So my wife called him a ####-head. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.

    Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus. We try to have a little fun each day now that we're retired. It's important at our age.

    Jayson

  3. This prostitute who was also a Cricket fan, got a tattoo of Ricky Ponting and Shane Warne on the inside of her thighs.

    She says to her customer "If you can guess who they are you get a free naughty.".

    He looks to the left and then to the right and says "I dunno who those ugly bastards are

    but the one in the middle with the fat lips and curly hair is Andrew Symonds!

    Jayson

  4. This is more fact than joke, but still a good read;)

    An Obituary printed in the London Times........ Interesting and sadly rather true.

    'Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.

    Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

    His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

    Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

    Common Sense declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

    Common Sense lost the will to live as some churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

    Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

    Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust his wife, Discretion his daughter, Responsibility his son, Reason He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, I'm A Victim.

    Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

    Jayson

  5. For some reason I cant open the old "funnies" thread

    :( :( :(

    So I'm kicking of a new one.......

    A wealthy hospital benefactor was being shown around the hospital.

    During her tour she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating

    furiously.

    'Oh my GOD!' screamed the woman. 'That's disgraceful! Why is he doing

    that?'

    The doctor who was leading the tour calmly explained, 'I'm very sorry

    that you were exposed to that, but this man has a serious condition

    where his testicles rapidly fill with semen, and if he doesn't do that

    at least five times a day, he'll be in extreme pain and his testicles

    could easily rupture.'

    Oh, well in that case, I guess it's okay,' said the woman.

    As they passed by the very next room, they saw a male patient laying in

    bed while a nurse performed oral sex on him. Again, the woman screamed,

    'Oh my GOD! How can THAT be justified?

    Again the doctor spoke very calmly: 'Same illness, better health plan.

    Jayson

  6. kriso wrote:

    when you doin it i gota see this lol i got some stands you can use for the trailer and trolley jack and few other toys to make it a bit more easy job if ya need

    Yeah gunna need tools, I sold all mine when I quit mechanics. Have you got a Grease gun and needle kriso? I dont want to get my hands dirty:silly: :P

    Jayson

  7. bootyinblue wrote:

    About as many bearings and some blokes have brains!

    Shortie, how good are you with 12v stuff if I bring around the boat, the lights, the stereo and a slab?

    Pick a day that I'm not working and I'll do the wheel bearings while you two drink the slab;)

    Jayson

×
×
  • Create New...