A Christmas Poem

[Gad]

T`was the night before Christmas

And all through the house

Everybody felt shitty

Even The Mouse

Mom at the whorehouse

And Dad smoking grass

I`d just settled down

For a nice piece of Ass

When out on the lawn

I heard such a clatter

I sprung from my piece

To see what was the matter

Then out on the lawn

I saw a big prick

I knew in a moment

It must be St.Nick

He came down the chimney

Like a bat out of Hell

I knew in a moment

The prick must have fell

He filled all our stockings

With pretzels and beer

He even left something

For my brother who`s Queer

He rose up the chimney

With a thunderous fart

The big fat prick

Blew the chimney apart

He swore and he cursed

As he rode out of sight

“Piss on you all

And have a hell of a Dayâ€

PC addendum.. for any SNAGGs my dictionary states

Queer: strange,odd,eccentric

[ellicat]

'Twas the night before Christmas

And in that bedroom of ours

I was tearing off fast

My wife's see-thru blouse

For she had come home

And was heading upstairs

Those damned kids of mine

Had me doing Daddy dares

I hurriedly threw the blouse under the bed

I need not have bothered for she soon fell down dead

It's not the first time that has happened

When I have been seen half naked.

The End